Kids, in case you are ever short on reasons to love your family, here are the top 5 (current) reasons.
05) The other day, my father (your Papa) was playing wiffle ball and (apparently) crashed into Deea (wife of my cousin), giving her a concussion, stitches in the ear, and a dislocated shoulder. Deea is a very sweet person and surely didn't deserve this. I have no idea how it happened. I simply know that it is just ridiculous enough to make the list (and my lack of details makes it an even better/more tragic story).
04) Your Aunt Maggie was recently robbed. The thief entered her home, went through her panties, stole her computer, bled on her bed, BUT did NOT take her bike. Score.
03) Your parents are taking you to LouFest. Carolina Chocolate Drops. Jeff Tweedy. Built to Spill. Zooey Deschanel. Want to know what music I was involved in as a 7 year old? Safety Kids. That's right. Me dressed up as Freddy holding a stuffed frog hollering, "You're not gonna get rich on me!" while my mother (your Mimi) mouthed the words from the audience. *
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(That was a story about your Mom's family that I can't tell you. It's really cute and endearing, but it might be misunderstood and lead to awkward silence, so it's probably best just left like this.)
Drum roll...
1) Your aunt Kari used to be married to Jerad. For a variety of reasons, they got divorced. Things were a bit dicey for a spell, but they are fairly smooth now. Their wonderful kids (your cousins) are well-adjusted and Kari and Jerad have begun their own separate lives.
Or have they?
Kari met a great guy named Kelly who loves her and the boys. He bought her a ring. They are getting married on June 12th.
Jerad met a gal named Kelly who loves him and the boys (I think). He bought her a ring (which according to Facebook looks a LOT like Kari's ring). They are getting married on June 12th.
Good thing they have three boys. Two ring bearers and one to spare? Any more Kellys up for a wedding?
And those, my sweet children, are five reasons you should love your family.
* I actually enjoyed Safety Kids, so thank you Mom. I'm not sure how or why I got involved...but I think it might have been Mom's first attempt at a multi-level work-from-home-business. Indeed, she didn't "get rich on me." Now if I were a little boy made of wax, then the story would have (does have) a different ending.
