no trouble, mister

My son certainly doesn't get his healthy respect for authority from me. I'm the guy who got an internal suspension in high school for telling my chemistry teacher he needed a "shot of masculinity" (in my defense, he had just told me I needed a "shot of maturity"...we were probably both right). Today at the public pool Brennan was alerted to the new rule which bans outside food and drink (fascists). When Lori (my wife) tried to get Brennan to eat a homemade PBJ he refused, citing the new rule. When she explained that some rules are meant to be broken (I love my wife) he continued to resist. Finally he relented, but only after Lori helped him devise a plan whereby he could hide his contraband under a towel, eating his sandwich in covert anonymity, out of the glaring eye of "he who whistles." He peaked out from underneath his protective shield only occasionally to ensure the lifeguard wasn't on to his deviant behavior. Later in the day as we were walking out to the car from the mall I was trying to convince Zoe that if she ran into a certain spot on the wall, which I promised was Platform 9 3/4, we could take the Hogwarts Express home. When both kids refused to play into my fantasy, I ran into the "platform" myself, only to be rejected with a swift thud. I responded that we would now just have to take the flying car home, even though it was strictly against the code to do so in front of Muggles. Brennan pondered our pretend predicament, then responded, "or you could just send an owl and explain the situation. That way we don't get in trouble and risk losing points for Gryffindor." When we finally did get to the car (which at this point was not a flying car...good grief) I pulled into a handicap spot momentarily as we waited for Lori. I looked in the rear view mirror to catch Brennan's reaction, and like clockwork he got that look of concern on his face and let me know that "it is against the law to park in a wheelicap space." I was about to turn around and explain again the little deal about breaking rules, but my plan was thwarted by the mall cop who was sitting there, smiling, waving me to move along and leave the wheelicap space for someone else...who was wheelicapped. I pulled away, and looked once again in the rear view mirror to find Brennan smiling smugly, satisfied that this mall cop had validated his day of obedience and proved to his dad that just because you're brave enough to make fun of your chemistry teacher in high school, doesn't mean all authority can be disregarded. Touche. Today I was outcooled by a mall cop, but tomorrow I'll teach Brennan all about BitTorrent...